Invest in Your Self-Care

There is nothing that says ‘I love me’ like taking care of your mind, body, and soul. Self-care is an expression of self-love. When I think of self-care I consider things that I can do for myself specifically, as well as things that I can get done for* myself to enhance my well-being, appearance, self-confidence, and sense of inner peace in ways that I deem necessary and relevant. Self-care is not you being selfish, so don’t let anyone guilt you into feeling bad for needing time to take care of yourself.

In this blog, I will discuss some positive and healthy self-care activities in which you can indulge:

Girl, take a bath.

I don’t mean go bathe, I mean go sit down in the bathtub and soak. Some of you all probably cannot remember the last time you sat down in a tub, some of y’all probably haven’t done so since you were a child. In either case, it’s safe to say you also don’t remember how soothing it is - especially with a glass of wine, the right playlist in the background, candles lit alongside the tub, and your phone on do not disturb. Add some bath petals, salts, bubble bath, a bath bomb, and lay back and enjoy for 30 minutes minimum. Yes, I’m setting the scene for you. It’s a whole vibe, I promise.

Go get your hair done.

Many Black women (in fact almost every black woman I know among my relatives and friends) have left relaxers in the past and are what we call ‘au naturale.’ As naturals however, many of us have been thrust into a lifestyle of self-sufficiency regarding our hair, or we only deal with our hair between protective styles. So, this self care tip is for all of us, no matter which season we are in with our hair - let someone else give it some TLC sometimes. Take a break from those self-done wash-n-go’s and take a trip to a professional cosmetologist who can trim (not cut) your ends, cleanse your scalp thoroughly, thermal deep condition, and who you can have copasetic, relatable conversation with you while getting pampered.

Mani & Pedi.

Getting a manicure and/or pedicure is probably the most frequent and common things on this list that we indulge ourselves in routinely. If you aren’t on the schedule for a mani and pedi every couple of weeks, then you should pencil some into your busy life. If you’re into getting your nails done, you can identify with the satisfaction it brings to get a fresh coat of polish or a fresh set, but that’s just the cake. The pedicure however, is the icing. Fellas, pedicures are for you too. If your heels have been scratching your lady’s legs in the bed at night or snagging on the sheets, go get you a pedicure! It’s a nail salon on every corner for goodness sakes!

Schedule a massage.

Unless your significant other is a professional* masseuse, they “can’t compete where they can’t compurr,” in the wise words of Moneybagg Yo. Nah I’m playing but seriously, getting a massage is the epitome of relaxation and self-care. Everyone deserves this experience at least once in their life, from real hands, not those chairs at the nail salon or your local mall. Look, all I’m saying is, leave some things to a professional.

And on that note… ever had a facial?

Not many people I know get facials on a regulatory basis, though we may have a skincare routine at home and/or apply face masks from time-to-time. From what I learned in my mid twenties til now, skincare is big business and rightfully so because our bare face is the primary focal point when making contact with other people. The best thing about getting a facial is that it is not a one routine fits all deal, facials are tailored to your individual skin needs. Consult a trained esthetician to get you right.

Take a nap.

Some of you all have been awake too long and too much, you need to get some rest. Sleep is paramount to self-care. You’re not your best self when you’re sleep deprived, and at some point you will crash. Enhance your mood and spirit by ensuring that you are getting adequate rest..

Get off the sofa and exercise!

Stop creating excuses for why you are not able to exercise or work out, excuses are tools of nothingness … At the crux of self-care is the wherewithal to ensure one’s mind and body are well. Someone who ensures they spend time being physically active understands how physical fitness relates to caring for oneself. In case you didn’t know, exercising releases many neurotransmitters (endorphins, dopamine, serotonin) that help boost mood and lower depression and anxiety. You don’t even have to become a gym rat, just realize that walking for 20-30 minutes is better than a sedative cycle of doing nothing except sitting on your lazy rump all day.

Invest in your mental health.

While you’re taking care of your body and spirit, make sure you don’t forget about your mind to ensure that it is well taken care of too. If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you twice, there is power in mental healthcare. Ensuring your mental health is in check shows that you’re doing the work.

While you’re out putting in the work to improve yourself physically, emotionally, & mentally, don’t be afraid to “date around.” What I mean is, if your experience getting a certain service does not go well, don’t be afraid to try again, with someone else or some place different. Don’t feel bad for not repeating something that just did not work for you. Have your own best interest at heart and spend your coins only where your standards are met and where you feel comfortable. Now go forth and self care!

What is self-care to you/what are some things you like to do for your self care?

Do you have plans to incorporate something new or different into your self-care plan? If so, what is it?