My First Official* Mother’s Day
This year, Mother’s Day took on a whole new meaning for me. Not only am I blessed to still have a mother (with whom I would have loved to be able to spend my first official Mother’s Day), I also got to be celebrated and recognized as a mother for the first time of many more to come!
As for how my day went, it mostly felt like a normal weekend day outside of a few special moments; I wasn’t expecting much however. As usual, I was awakened by my hungry baby so I nursed him, and shortly after, we went back to sleep for a couple hours longer. Those additional hours of sleep had me feeling rejuvenated when we finally got up to start our day! I was excited to put on clothes, I mean clothes that actually make me look like something, since the majority of my days have been spent with hair plaited/twisted up with a hair scarf on, rocking a t-shirt and joggers, or workout clothes (whether I end up working out that day or not lol). I was excited to create a light makeup look - eyebrows slayed, cheeks highlighted a shimmery gold, my short natural lashes extended with some mascara, and lips glossed with a lipstick lip gloss combination. All for pictures with my baby mostly; but also to remind myself (and my husband) that even though I’m a mommy, I’m still a baddie and don’t you EVER forget it, OKAY?! lol So we planned to go to my mother-in-law’s house to deliver her gift and to just kick it with her for the day, but to our surprise when we pulled up to her house, she was not there. My husband and I then improvised and devised a plan to order food and just go to a park, but the location was a surprise to me. I really didn’t care what we did, I just did not want to go back home so soon. Especially since I had taken the time and put forth the effort to actually look like something on this particular day! When we arrived at the park, it was so beautiful, overlooking a huge lake. The only downside was that it was chilly in the shaded area where we ate, but once we moved into the sun during picture time, it was all good! This was the best part of my first official Mother’s Day - having lunch with my husband and son at a beautiful lake, followed by taking pictures with my baby. I have always known that once I had a child, I would love my child unconditionally, but I truly love him more and more each day because each day is a new discovery. I love being his mommy.
I received a beautiful bouquet of roses, a balloon and a card from my boys (my husband and son); a Mother’s Day card from an aunt; a Mother’s Day card & moolah from one of my best friends; a personalized “mommy’s sippy cup” from a cousin; dozens of texts and direct messages; and a box FULL of goodies shipped to me from my mom and dad, which included my and my baby’s personalized shirts. Shout out to everyone who sent me a “Happy Mother’s Day” text or direct message, you all truly warmed my heart and I am greatly appreciative of you!
Now, let’s get into some of the pictures!
Three years ago, Mother’s Day became a day I viewed as bittersweet. Although I was coping with grief from the loss of my baby, I was still blessed to have my own living mother and would have been remiss not to have honored her every year thereafter; especially after she had stuck by my side closer than anyone during the difficulty I faced a little over a month prior to Mother’s Day that year. In the first year of my loss and maybe the next, I intentionally avoided social media on Mother’s Day because I knew it would trigger feelings I wanted to escape on that day.
Mother’s Day just hits a lil different when you are a mother, when you have lost a mother, when you have tried to become a mother and have not yet succeeded, and when you have lost a child. Most people do not consider the people who fall in the last three categories on Mother’s Day, because it’s like what do you say to people who have experienced or are experiencing these things? It’s basically uncharted territory and the average person just wants to avoid awkwardness, and I get it. Nevertheless, if you have lost your mother or mother-figure, lost a child, and/or desire to be a mother but you are just having a hard time, my heart goes out to you. I am thinking of you, I see you, and I am praying for you.
